“None of us wants to admit that we hate someone…When we deny our hate we detour around the crisis of forgiveness. We suppress our spite, make adjustments, and make believe we are too good to be hateful. But the truth is that we do not dare to risk admitting the hate we feel because we do not dare to risk forgiving the person we hate.” Lewis B. Smedes – Forgive & Forget: Healing the Hurts We Don’t Deserve
Shall I Forgive or Forget
The quote by fame Christian author Lewis B. Smedes above signifies more people possibly willingly to admit they own this position. In fact, some of my contemporaries who allege undying faith to God hold such sentiments. Subsequently, forgiveness is not an active commandment of their faithful requirements. However, unbeknown to the blind, without forgiveness, a true relationship with God is unobtainable.
When we clutch anger and resentment, we block the flow of God’s love. Please, let us not deceive ourselves, you cannot hate and honor God at the same time. Not forgiving is a form of extreme dislike of a person or their actions. As a result, when we refuse to forgive, we chain ourselves to those individuals and the continued judgment and condemnation of their offense. “Once a woman has forgiven her man, she must not reheat his sins for breakfast.” ~Marlene Dietrich
Forgiveness is a conscious decision not easily constructed. As such, some individuals maintain unmovable positions toward family members, ex-friends and foes for decades. One would not have to think long to recall those who will not forgive individuals for past events.
Also, and sorrowfully, some voice these pseudo commitments as acts of uprightness. Unfortunately, without an ounce of recourse they publicize their bitterness as a token of conviction to all who would listen. “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”~Mahatma Gandhi…
Why No Peace
Happiness and love does not exist within a spirit full of judgments and condemnations. You have deceived yourself if one adopts such foolishness of thought. Surely, one understand not to forgive burns the holder of the hate, not the perpetrator. In essence, you enslaved yourself with your narrowed intentions. In addition, one remains bitter at not only past events, but engages in constant judgment and condemnation of individuals’ present behaviors.
As such, we notice these individuals possessing opinions on every subjects. Sadly, they cannot maintain balance by allowing things to go by without comment. Unfortunately, no spirit can obtain peace with such ego-driven principles. As an example whatever these individuals disagree with they form an almost unshakable hate. They struggle with making sense of others’ behaviors, even when not directed toward them. Often, they find themselves in troubled spirit, as a result of attempting to control and manipulate the behaviors of others. “To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” ~Lewis B. Smedes,
The key to happiness is forgiveness. To release someone from your disapproval and to love them is Godly. As we can attest, love is the absence of negativity, as even the Bible proclaims, “Perfect love cast out all fears.” Hate, resentment, and judgment are fear-based emotions, with that said, do not misconceive your ego-driven intentions. You heard it here first. “Love and forgiveness creates healing, fear sustain the pain.”