What is Spiritual Faith?

First, What Faith is Not

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Faith is not relentless praying and meditating until wishes come true. **Faith is not the practice of good behavior with hopes of a better life here or after**Faith is not the practice of customs, traditions or rituals ** Faith is not precondition behaviors for rewards, faith is not tithes**faith is not hate or intolerance**faith is not God is “On our Side,” ** faith is not a pastor, minister, pope, bishop, palm reader or fortune teller ** faith is not specific behaviors practiced on certain days ** faith is not men-only to being preachers ** faith is not believing all who disagree with your faith should burn in hell ** faith is not heterosexual nor homosexual preference ** faith is not race, creed or color ** faith is not religious clothing ** faith is not chants, mantras, or The Lord’s pray ** Faith is not the Bible, Koran, or any other book, who claims it’s a book of faith ** Faith is not being right ** faith is not a great spiritual orator ** faith is not a mega-church or a small cozy one ** faith is not an act of miracles ** faith is not the Virgin Mary ** a picture of a crying Jesus ** or a bright light witnessed in near death situations ** Faith is not things working out for you ** faith is not converting followers to your faith ** faith is not abstinence ** faith is not abstaining from pre-martial sex, alcohol, booze or drugs, ** and faith is not the sole ownership of those who believes their faith is stronger than others.

What is Faith?

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Faith is nothing. Faith is thoughtless, faith is silence, faith is stillness, faith is inner-spirit, faith is self-harmony, faith is non-judgmental, faith is egoless, faith is love of all and abandonment of none, faith is guiding one’s own life, faith is change, faith is spiritual balance, faith is self-discovery, faith is self-honesty, faith is patience, faith is self-awareness, faith is desire-less, faith is non-expectations, faith is inner-growth, faith is inclusion…Faith is saying, I’m sorry…Faith is accepting I’m sorry…Faith is forgiveness…Faith is love… Faith is blind….

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Robert Williams

How Near Thy Kingdom, O Lord?

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Tongues who proclaim God’s

wisdom slay the unsaved.

The dead chained to ideology

and piety thirst for thy word.

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Man’s doctrines lead us away.

In the wilderness we flail about.

Children, the Gospel is not hidden

as thy Son proclaim, it is near.

As a child in thy Mother’s womb

so is the kingdom.

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The thirsts of God’s love will not go unquenched.

So, prepare thy spirit for its return.

Vanquish all fears, beliefs and judgments.

For the breast milk of the

Lord shall feed thy hearts.

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Let not the spirit be deceived

by your fathers’ customs.

Tear down those traditions

that one enters unblemished.

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We enter the Kingdom not by

man’s way of life but one’s own heart.

We enter the kingdom not of obligations,

conditions or mandate, but by the

Love and forgiveness of God.

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The Kingdom of Heaven is in you.

Love and forgive yourself, and

you can love and forgive anyone.

This, the Gospel of Jesus.

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Thy Kingdom is not far.

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The Invisible Dragon

My Hidden Agenda, Ego

If you’re afraid of being grabbed by God, don’t look at a wall.

Definitely don’t sit still.

Jiyu Kennett (Essential Zen)

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Ego-Intentions

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The last few days have produced an undeniable realization. This past week I had two conversations that I perceived as well-intended going in, unfortunately both blew up in my face. It would waste time to discuss particulars, however, each recipients declared my engagement as egotistical and pretentious. They were right.

What went wrong?

My motives were Ego-Driven.

The discussions clocked in my fears and uncertainties about my life provoked unkind remarks. The talks doomed from the beginning because, I was not aware of my ego’s intentions.

Irreconcilable Differences: Ego and Me

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For years I was unable or unwilling to be transparent with myself. Although my body and spirit ache with pain I surged forward with blinders. To pause ,would be to admit spiritual helplessness and so I deliberately erected distractions to comfort that pain.

Most of my activities for nearly 25 years were counter-surveillance maneuvers against my 36166_9069 false perceptions. Ego strives on separation, it keeps our thoughts in two states, the past (pain) or future (desires).

When we communicate we are representing our consciousness. When I assessed those conversations I realized my ego presented a half-truth, paramount to a lie. Underneath my spirit, fears, doubts, and uncertainty  about my future. In the perverse realm of ego, “Let me help you” should have been, “Let me help myself.”

The Fear of the Unknown is not normal

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The ego works from perceptions, perceptions are filtered through human senses. I perceived my wife and friend need my help.  However it was my personal fears desiring (ego) their help (attachment). I wanted help in controlling my future. My ego was driving me again, I lost faith.

Ego is (1) fear and doubt (2) lives in the past and (3) lust for the future. A higher consciousness is of (God) truth and ego of (Man). How do you know which one is at work? If transparent love and harmony exist, God; if pain exist ego.

I am humble and thankful to those who help guide me to inner peace. However, attachments are attributes of ego, I must them let go, (Family, and Friends) so I can secure my spirit of peace.

The Invisible Dragon

Stepping out on Faith…

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Damn, Change is Scary

To achieve a higher state of consciousness one must accept her path (past). Whatever our past results produced we must appreciate the experience.

It is not a manner of denying responsibility for actions, but enlightenment. Our darkest moments created a spiritual vessel guided to a higher awareness.

As we ascend into higher realms, we become incessantly grateful; our past is not a scarlet letter, but a manuscript on change. No religion, philosophy, or spiritual institute can be sincere, if it lacks evidence of followers who changed their consciousness.

The Double Agent

Do not be fooled however by a temporary change of behavior as a higher consciousness. We deceive ourselves with disguises of spiritual espionage with acting Godly daily. Pretending to be something we are not takes a lot of energy; we constantly dread our cover being blown.

Living falseness as truth produces a great amount of stress and anxiety.  Often,  most possess the old consciousness with a new set of diverse linguistics.

The Key to Redemption16172_32a5

Only when the old consciousnesses completely decay, and only then, a new one is born. The change of consciousness is night and day.

The only resemblance of the former spirit is the body that held it.. A higher consciousness is hard work; it is painful and joyful at the same time.

Accept past results by rectifying the pain, and then elevating the consciousness. There is no public document on how to raise the individual consciousness; this can only be accomplished inside your soul, alone with God.

No one can teach or preach your deliverance, you must live it,

because who knows your dark secrets better than you.

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The Invisible Dragon

My Bad-Ass Mother…

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All photo Google images

Something about my Mother…

My life consists of a set of wishes. (1) Unity of Family, (2) Never Quit, Never Give up, (3) Be Honest with Yourself, and (4) Accept Yourself. These are not all the wishes I have but they are at the core of my human existence. Every facet of my life begins with this framework and the credit of this paradigm goes to my Mother.

My desire of a close-knit family comes directly from childhood. Growing up poor on Chicago’s south side in the 60’s and 70’s, my memories are similar to thousands like myself who was part of the ‘Great Migration.” As Latino immigrants flood America today in search of a better life so too did Blacks in the 50’s.

Their mass exodus from the swelter heat of Jim Crowism, racism, discrimination, and lack of decent employment opportunities drove herds of them to cities like Chicago, Detroit, and New York.  As African wildebeest and zebras travel the Serengeti for water and grazing annually, so too Blacks went north for respite and redemption. Thousands in search of the America dream flooded the South and West side of Chicago changing the demography overnight.

Chicago, Sweet Old Chicago

2D2577BCDC834AD8A6684F7037B2CA3D Some found their dreams and some like my Mother continued their nightmare, as a single pregnant teen she left the south as to disguise family shame and not for greener pastures.  The shame of teen pregnancy was deeper then grown Black men being called, “Boy” or chronic physical beatings Black women suffered from Black husbands, boyfriends and fathers in the south.  A pregnant teen was considered an obtuse figure and given a train ride with their “mistake” out of town.

In this tiny apartment lived a single Mother of 6, a dog, mice on occasions, monthly visits from welfare social workers reminding her how detrimental a husband would be to her receiving benefits and a big white-book with a big white Jesus on her dresser. We were pathologically dysfunctional from the beginning.

My Mother was 13, uneducated, single and thrust into one of the many fiercely-segregated neighborhoods of Chicago (Englewood) to fend for herself. She had no role models that I knew, her Mother, my grandmother (Dorthy) a chronic alcoholic did not give much hope to life.

An All-American Bad Ass,

Oh, she was in the “shit” no doubt; her daily anthem, how do I feed and clothe my children.  A miserable view from the eyes of a child.  It however was there I understood family unity; although admittedly by the dysfunctions; I learned what unity can prevailed against.

She was the All-American 60’s Black Ghetto woman, five children hanging on her tities wherever she went, (My last sibling would come later when she married) she had amazing personal and physical strength as a young Mother. I realized early her physical strength; one of her pet peeves was for us to always call her mommy, never by her first name, “Ann.”  I was quickly enrolled in a apprentice program of Black cultural Do’s and Don’t,s by my teacher, “Ann.” praise woman

In 1967, I learned that not only was it a cultural taboo to call her by “Ann,” but unforgivable to do it in front of her friends. One night in our tiny apartment we shared with her two sisters and my cousins, I somehow wondered into a “grown folks” conversation (another cultural no-no) and somehow injected the word “Ann” into the open atmosphere.

Do What I Say

I did not know there was a different in hand preference as a child, you do not notice which hand a person uses most it’s not important as a child.  Well I discovered my Mother was left-handed, a southpaw, and after the unforgettable stinging stop in my mouth I never lost that knowledge. She slapped the “Shit” out of me, I feel it like it happened yesterday; her hands were liken to a champion boxer, fast, strong;  I never saw it coming.  As I staggered away dizzy and discombobulated, I never called my mother “Ann” again, or at least where she could hear me.  (I was a rascal.)

On occasions her instructions were met with a slow response or a disrespectful non-verbal gesture, her radar picked up the activity, her missile disguised as a left-hand was launched before the combatant took another step. Man down! Medic!

As my wounded sibling or me raced for cover, for you learned not to retreat was also a form of disrespect, she then would unleash “Hell.” Whatever object at her nearest disposal was applied to your disrespectful “Black Ass” as she would shout angrily…usually my aunt or grandmother would administrated respite to us soon after however.

comment from the author…

…I loved my Mother’s strength…no matter how dysfunctional it looked to the outside…inside of it was my salvation.

Robert Williams